- The (mostly) unflappable Sonja “SexyJ” Morgan never ceases to amaze me. She’s not mad about Bethenny blowing up at her for the TipsyGirl thing because she knows Bethenny was hurting and in pain and Sonja understands that B needed to unleash the wrath on her a bit. On the other hand, Sonja is less quick to forgive Dorinda for the lack of invite to the Berkshires. I completely get this. Bethenny had a right to be pissed. I don’t particularly think B handled it all that well, but she certainly had the right to be upset. Whereas Dorinda disinviting Sonja was calculated and bizarre. I think we can all agree that if Sonja had come to the Berkshires, Bethenny would have stayed home and that ran the risk of the trip never making it on the air so Dorinda made a choice. She chose to exclude Sonja for the sake of QueenB. I get why Sonja’s still upset, but omg, CAN YOU IMAGINE IF THE BERKSHIRES HAD BEEN A THREE DAY TRIP?! Also, I love how we only spend 30 seconds on the fact that Ramona was originally going to be involved in TipsyGirl. Ramona is a minion of B’s now though, so Bethenny drops it instead of eviscerating her. Ramona must be relieved.
- I want to get where Bethenny and Carole are trying to come from with the whole “it was only one night that you were excluded!” thing, except that’s not even close to being true. The whole first half of this season we only saw Sonja in bits and pieces, usually with Luann. Now, I know some of that had to do with Sonja & Luann holding out for a bigger payday, but Sonja wasn’t at the bra party, she wasn’t at the intro lunch with Jules, she basically wasn’t in a room with Bethenny until much later in the season when B decided to grace Sonja with her presence. And, look, I understand not being on #TeamLuann. Lu is a tough egg to swallow and there’s lots not to like there. But Sonja is sweet and kind and only wants the best for people. Excluding her from anything is a dick move. Also? She looks bomb this evening. Her dress is from her collection (which an incredibly bored and rendered useless Jules lets us know) and Sonja looks stunning in it. And as you all know, there’s nothing I love more than a sincere housewives apology so I give props to Sonja for apologizing and expressing her regret about the comments she made regarding Luann’s yacht and ring. Her words were catty, and she’s right to apologize.
- In my mind, all reality TV shows live in the same universe (sort of like Kevin Smith’s View Askewniverse) and so it always upsets me when there isn’t a crossover. I.e. when someone buys their wedding dress anywhere other than Kleinfelds, or in this case I’m annoyed that the crew of Luann’s yacht isn’t made up of the Below Deck yachties. Something else I find annoying? The notion that just because two women have slept with the same man, they can’t ever be friends or can’t even be happy for one another. Some of you know this, but for those who don’t, Kerry and I know each other because she is married to my ex-boyfriend. Like Tom (yikes, I hope in only this regard), I am friendly with all of my exes. Kerry’s husband Daniel is someone who I’ve known since I was 11 and we dated for most of the first half of my twenties. It was a serious relationship (we lived together and definitely talked about marriage as an eventuality), but ultimately it wasn’t the right relationship for either of us. After we broke up and had a few months of distance, Daniel and I were able to come back and regain our original friendship. A few months after that, he met Kerry and they are an awesome couple. Kerry and I met sometime after that, clicked almost immediately, and we decided to start this blog a year or so later because during my maternity leave, we’d send each other our 10thoughts on that week’s VPR. At this point I’d say I’m probably closer to Kerry than Daniel as K and I talk every day whereas Daniel and I check in every few weeks. So yeah, it pisses me off when people assume a cat fight is brewing just because two women have dated the same guy. But really, Luann invited everyone because she was contractually obligated to invite everyone, right? If I were Lu, I wouldn’t have invited Ramona to my engagement party. Not because she dated my fiancé, but because she’d been a giant cunt about my relationship all season. Why would you want someone at your engagement party who isn’t there to celebrate your relationship?
- Hey Bethenny, just because Andy Cohen asks you a question doesn’t mean you have to be mean and nasty in your answer. Sure, you were asked a direct question, but you are not alone in that room. The women you are speaking about are less than 5 feet away from you. Jesus Christ. QueenB gets so fucking testy when someone disagrees with her. And stop hiding behind the shield of “Well, that’s my opinion”. Just because something is your opinion doesn’t mean it’s not wrong. It can be your opinion that global warming doesn’t exist or that vaccines cause autism, but that doesn’t make you right. Also, (and I know this isn’t related to anything else) fuck off, Jenny McCarthy. And another thing, Carole. If a crowd of people all tell you that you act a certain way with Bethenny and a different way without her, you don’t get to choose if that’s the truth. If anything, you’re the unreliable narrator here because everyone and their mother can see it but you can’t. It’s adorable that you don’t think you act differently, but you absofuckinglutely do. Oh, and I don’t believe for one minute that Bethenny yelling at Carole for being late wasn’t planned. I HATE it when people are late, but that felt far too calculated. Especially after Carole made a point to not hang with B that day. Oh, sorry…one last thing. Don’t tell a fan of the show who hasn’t even been rude to you to “sit down”. I hope to god you have a ghostwriter for your twitter account, otherwise you’re a vile person. #SoTurntOnYouBoo
#StandWithSue
- Is anyone else excited about the possible matchup of a Bethenny v. Dorinda season? I’d LOVE that. If Dorinda can stay moderately sober, she’s our best hope of putting Bethenny in her place at all next season (assuming they don’t bring in a ringer). It was almost precious to hear Bethenny say she felt attacked at the reunion. Um, doll? You reap what you sow.
- I LOVED it when Dorinda told Bethenny “It’s not about you, it’s about Luann”, because she’s absolutely correct. Bethenny telling Carole and Ramona first about the Tom-bomb was catty and proves she did not have Luann’s best interests at heart. And here’s the thing about that- Bethenny doesn’t have to have Lu’s best interests at heart. I would respect it so much more if she just owned up to it and said “I got this juicy information about you and we aren’t really friends so I felt no need to come to you first. And yeah, I said it on camera because we’re making a TV show here folks. Look alive.” THIS is what I mean about Bethenny not being as “real” as her minions and apologists insist she is.
- Bethenny thinking she did nothing wrong with her delivery of the Tom-bomb is….ugh. I’m just done. I’m just done with Bethenny. I’m frustrated that she can’t see how it would have been better to come to Luann first, or Dorinda if she were unsure. Why is that so hard to admit? Her actions greatly hurt a person sitting on that stage but she has no remorse and offers no real apology. I’ve said this a million times this season, but I’d really love it if Bethenny could get on a show where she likes all the people involved. I’ve loved B for years. I was THRILLED that she was coming back on the show. Now I can’t stomach her. And perhaps her worst crime has been turning Carole into someone I equally despise. I’m so thankful to the Bravo Gods that this is the last episode of the season. I need to not see B & C for a while to wash their mean-girl bitch stink off of my psyche.
- I don’t understand the Tom-wants-Dorinda-to-take-a-bullet thing. I’ve watched Dorinda’s explanation a few times and I still don’t get it. What were the waiters supposed to say? How was that supposed to work? I need diagrams and charts and a PowerPoint to explain it to me. You guys? I feel bad for Luann’s kids. I hope Luann takes a break from the show and only shows up as a friend next season, if at all. I don’t think I want to see the fallout from her marriage with Tom played out on my TV every week. And I really don’t want to hear Bethenny’s snarky comments about it.
- I think Luann truly thinks these women are her friends. That makes me sad for Luann. Also, I’m annoyed with the Bravo editors for making it seem like Ramona had evidence of Tom cheating again. That was a nothing moment that could have been left on the cutting room floor. And Luann? Making out publically with some random for over an hour is absolutely the definition of cheating. Both Manfriend and I drink like fish but if either of us made out with someone at a bar? Ummmm yes, I would consider that cheating. Of course, Manfriend and I have known each other for longer than 5 minutes so maybe that changes things. And while I do agree with her that a backroom affair would have been much more calculated, cheating is cheating is cheating.
- I got some flack on twitter (<3 you Cindy) for saying Ramona might not be the best person to judge what a good relationship is. I stand by that. I think anyone who has watched this show from the beginning would agree that Mario was scummy from day one. He never seemed all that into her and always had a bit of a wondering eye. I want to applaud Carole though for when she stuck up for Luann’s reasons for why she loves Tom. Not all relationship are created equal and we all have different priorities.
My final thoughts on this season:
There will be a part of me that will always love Bethenny. She was the reason I fell in love with RHONY in the first place, and I obsessively watched her spinoffs. I think she is a strong, wicked smart, funny woman who has inspired a ton of women. Which is why the slut shaming hit me as hard as it did. This was never about Bethenny apologizing to Luann, which I know she did. It was about her refusing to apologize for saying that word in general. It’s not okay. Ladies? PLEASE stop calling each other sluts. Please stop using that word to shame another woman’s legal and yes, moral right to have safe consensual sex with anyone she pleases. Too many young girls are shamed and bullied into thinking it’s better that they take their own lives than face the scrutiny of their peers for doing something men and boys are applauded for. I believe it was Carlton from RHOBH who once said (and I’m paraphrasing) that women would be in charge of the world if we just stopped getting in our own way. I think we have to stop tearing each other down, especially in regards to sex. I appreciate B saying at the end that she ultimately doesn’t care what Luann does in her personal life and having recently rewatched season 3, I do remember what a long and sordid history Bethenny has with Luann. Luann has been awful to her in the past. But focus on that, B! Not on who or how many people Luann is banging in her free time.
I’m also sad that Jules is leaving. I didn’t love her initially, but I think she deserved a 2nd season. I also want Luann to bow out next season, but I’m guessing she won’t. Sonja, I’d like to stay since she needs the paycheck, but Carole has probably run her course with the show. She doesn’t have a real story for fans to follow any longer and playing B’s puppet is unbecoming (and is of course the reason she will be sticking around). Ramona is The Worst, but she’s an institution now and Dorinda is always a drunken delight so they both have to stay.
I’m ready to put this show to bed. It’s been stressful and that’s not what I want my junk food TV to be. I’d welcome a huge cast shakeup but I know we won’t get it.
And lastly to you- our readers, thank you for hanging in there. Thank you for sticking with me even when I’ve been pissy and ranty about this show. You guys are the absolute best and Kerry and I are forever grateful for how you’ve helped this website grow and continue to help us see it’s potential. We’re gonna stick around as long as you’ll have us. Cheers to you all!
10thoughts written by Liz
Just an excellent post and a wonderful blog in general.
When I read #6 I thought, “yes! that is a defining thought on the whole show. Brava!” But #7 is even better, and when I got to #8, I was nearly cheering, saved only by a last minutes reality-check, before I almost high-fived the screen.
Funniest/cutest/best of all is #StandWithSue. Jeez! Cool Carole really loses her cool easily — with a random person on Twitter who made a relatively benign comment. But maybe Carole is easily impressionable and learned this “sit down” stuff from Luann who tried a similar technique with Carole at the reunion. “Stop yammering over there!” (paraphased, of course).
Please keep writing. You have such an original, logical voice and perspective. And I bet that even when I will eventually disagree, I’ll still enjoy your clever writing. Many thanks. 🙂
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I like your blogs and I #StandWithSue too! 😀 ❤
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As much as I like Bethenny, there were times where I really think she should of kept her mouth shut. That goes for Luann and Dorinda as well.
I was very surprised by Jules, when she wasn’t being talked-over by 3 other women, she actually had some of the best comments. For example, how she handled Bethenny about her divorce and reason’s for coming onto the show. She didn’t attack, she simply said it was totally fine if Bethenny repeated what she heard, but they were just rumors. Something to that effect, I just thought it was a rather mature and concise comment.
Ramona being there was unnecessary, she added nothing really, besides Tom talk.
I find it exhausting listening to all these women, but especially Luann when she get’s caught in a lie, then give’s a “what I meant was” explanation. She’s not so bright.
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Hi – Kerry here. Regarding number #4, Liz, I had this EXACT thought. It reminded me when Heather told Alexis at the RHOC reunion that if everyone tells you that you’re dead, it’s time to lie down. It also reminded me of a bit Louis CK does where he says you don’t get to decide if you’re an asshole; the people around you get to decide that – maybe you should listen. Ok Love you all!!
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First, I want to thank you for giving me the THRILL of being a hashtag #StandwithSue!!..Your blog is so fabulous. I love how you share your top 10 points; your writing is spot on.
I was also a huge Bethenny fan. Stood on line to meet her & have a book signed. Watched all the spinoffs, plus her talk show on and off. Rooted for her. Defended her.
Her ego has taken over, & it is very hard to watch. When she said “I can say whatever I want”, that pretty much summed her up.
I love Dorinda, and I love that for once, someone challenged her. B thinks that she is Teflon, and that Andy would always back her. Even he for once, told her she was very angry.
I find that B actually does give many f**ks, is a hypocrite & I am so tired of her. She is exhausting. I want the Bethenny back from the past. Snarky, funny. Not someone who shut shames women.
Again, thanks for the blog & and the shout out!!
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I’ve really enjoyed all your posts this season, maybe this one the best. I know you and many others had a tough time with Bethenny this season, and I realize that I just identify so closely with her that it hurts ME when people don’t like her – I know, I need a therapist LOL. But when you look back on past seasons like you did, you remember the history of Luann and Bethenny, and even how much Bethenny tried to help Sonja when the rest turned on her. I think Bethenny just had had enough with them both, and I still go with the stance that Bethenny’s purpose was to hypocrite-shame Luann, not slut-shame her, and she realized that’s not how it came out. I have zero ways of defending the “I say what I want” statement though.
What I’m trying and failing to say here, is that your posts are always about as fair as can be, and it’s been nice to read about the show without all the hate and vile comments I’ve seen elsewhere. These women put their lives, the good and the bad, out there for our entertainment. We don’t know them. Bethenny called Luann a name that Luann gives zero actual fucks about, and if she and/or Carole or even Luann or Ramona were horrid to each other, we need to remember they all got paid a good deal more than any of us make for the trouble, and they continue to sign up for it. I would rather be entertained than fill myself up with a bunch of hatred for people I don’t know.
In short, again, AGAIN, you do a great job here, and I hope you continue!!
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I understand what you’re saying Cindy, and I concur. Look, Lu love’s the show/publicity. She had a meltdown when she was demoted to FOH a few years back, since then she has been amped up the drama to ensure that golden apple. She just won’t let things die down, she invites any media outlet that will show up to film her trying on wedding dresses. She knows damn well the TomGate situation will come up, then she lashes out at Bethenny. She’s had a problem with B for quite some time, even before the Berkshires, but she is too dumb to know she will never outwit B.
I think what Lu got was a long time coming. The problem is that B lost her shit, and didn’t stay focused on the matter at hand. If Lu’s groove is giving blow jobs in public restrooms to either married or unmarried men, well that’s her business. And the wife’s, if she ever finds out. Lu is a liar and a hypocrite, B was 100% correct. She just went about it the wrong way.
I too get tired of the hate. It’s so nice to read a blog that is intelligent in it’s “thoughts”. It is totally possible to describe bad behavior without being vicious. I find it rather ironic that a blogger or commenter will say how awful it is to call another woman names, and that they are offended, then go on to calling B horrid names, diagnosis her with a mental illness and blame her for being addicted to Adderall. The worst is when I see ‘I feel sorry for her daughter’, or ‘poor Bryn’. That’s pretty low, she may be many things, but I think it’s pretty clear that she love’s that little girl and really wants to make a nice life for her.
One last thing, when B said “I’ll say what I want” it immediately took me to Cartman on South Park. “whateva, I’ll do what I want”.
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Thanks for this. I especially don’t get the commenters (on other sites) who are doing more vile things to (ANY reality show person) than that person does on TV.
Everyone has the right to their opinion, I just can’t stand the real nastiness. The 10ThoughtsBlog is really good at taking things apart and explaining things, both the facts and their own feelings. It’s been kind of a “safe place” for me to enjoy the RHONY recaps.
So Thanks again, 10TB!!!
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Wonderful essay. It was hard for me to watch the gang up against Sonja. How is it possible that Dorinda didn’t realize that no filming means no income. I’m certain all the women discussed this while they were in the Berkshires. Sonja did a great job standing up for herself. “You don’t care, Dorinda.”
I thought the, “Dry Cleaner….Hostess….Dry Cleaner….Hostess…” exchange was funny, but I didn’t think Sonja purposely set out to insult the one and only Madame P. King of Stains. (Maybe she did. Picture her getting ready and saying to herself, “I can’t believe I’m going to a Dry Cleaner party. What has happened to my life?”) Dorinda’s hostess comment wasn’t fair. I can think of many a hard working hostess. You’re not all that, Dorinda. And questions about coke use are still out there.
No more Ramona. No more. You can’t squeeze a cactus. Nothing there. Have you looked at her Twitter account? There she is posing in front of her Hampton pool. Oh, there she is pretending to rest on her sofa after a long summer weekend.
I’m looking forward to Sonja’s clothing brand expanding. I wonder if the Tipsy Girl line will happen?
Hope these story lines make it next season.
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Great blog.You hit great points that many think about Bethenny. She wants the shoe to be The Bethenny Show.Its not her show to do personal Skinny Girl Commercial.T one for her to go.
Interesting fact is she has me blocked on Twitter and i never directly tweeted her. She needs to be like some other HWs and not block everyone that doesn’t kiss her butt.
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