1. This season has been so long and full of Bethenny’s bad behavior that I’d almost forgotten about her mission to take down dry-cleaning-John. Look, John is a hairy bridge troll and there’s no two ways about that, but the trouble with someone like Bethenny going hard after anyone is that the person she’s screaming with becomes the victim. Bethenny’s behavior made me feel sorry for John (and Sonja and Luann and Jules), even if she was in the right or making good points.  To me, it’s never been about what she says, but how she says it.  If there are 14 different kind ways to say something, Bethenny always picks the much crueler option 15.  Of course Dorinda was “selling John”.  That’s what you do when you’re dating someone that your friends don’t like.  It’s not a crime.  And if Dorinda and John are happy getting lost in their coked out fever dream, let them be.

 

2. Anyone who reads this blog knows that I’m a sucker for a sincere apology. You can do just about anything you want on screen, but if you publically apologize and try to make it right, the slate’s wiped clean for me. That said, all Ramona ever seems to do is apologize.  She acts like a fucking maniac and then waxes poetic about how sorry she is.  Apologies like that mean nothing after a while.  Ramona is lucky to still be able to consider Dorinda as a friend by the end of this season.

I’ve said this before, but I truly believe that there is something that happens to Ramona when she’s on the show.  She turns into total swamp trash and becomes a horrible friend on camera.  Normally, I’d applaud her for bringing it, but I don’t think she has enough self-awareness to realize the differences in her behavior on-screen vs. off-screen.  We see or hear about these moments when Ramona is being so kind and wonderful.  Coming over to Bethenny’s with a book so that she wouldn’t be in the way, but B would know she wasn’t alone, is a particularly lovely Ramona moment, and there’s always 50+ women at her birthday lunches.  Plus, she seems to have had certain friends for years and years (Jill, Sonja, Dorinda), but when they come on the show with her, the relationship quickly devolves and becomes broken.  Something’s going on there.

 

3. Nothing proves the “Dorinda does drugs” theory more than all of the other housewives trying to quash the conversation. I appreciate Dorinda attempting to defend herself and acting so shocked and confused that these accusations have surfaced, but let’s be real. And look, if I was rich and didn’t have a small child living with me, I’d probably do a lot of coke too.  Coke is awesome.  It’s fun, and social, and makes you feel like a million dollars.  Of course, the next day is total hell, but most things, in moderation, are fine.  Murder and animal abuse being notable exceptions

 

4. I appreciate Bethenny acknowledging her terrible behavior with John at her birthday “tailgate” party. She was cold as ice and rude as hell. She absolutely should have asked Dorinda to not bring John.  But here’s the thing- Bethenny is a competent, self-aware chick and you can’t tell me that in her real life she wouldn’t have just asked Dorinda to come alone.  So while I know the B-apologists always applaud her for “keeping it real”, let’s you and I keep it real and acknowledge that Bethenny let John come to her party because she knew there would be a confrontation and that it would make for good tv.  Credited or not, Bethenny is a producer first, cast member second.

 

5. Rey is the greatest thing to ever happen to this franchise. Can someone please tell me how I can donate to Rey’s Charity That Helps Poor People? A few things on this topic–

  • Ramona was absolutely keeping Rey there to dig up dirt or at least cause a scene, so    spare me her wide-eyed “I had no idea!” shenanigans.  Ramona is The Worst.
  • Bethenny saying John had the “right content, wrong delivery” made me laugh.  Isn’t it funny how when you hate a person, what you are hating in that person is a part of yourself? Or, “What isn’t part of ourselves, doesn’t disturb us” (Hermann Hesse, novelist).  This seems to be Bethenny’s entire issue with everyone, now that I think about it.  She thinks John is brass and bullish.  Bethenny is no shrinking violet.  She is judgmental of most of the other women’s relationships, while admittedly sucking at them herself. Bethenny’s accused the other women of being “shit-stirrers” while maintaining puppet-master status all season. She admonishes Jules for having an eating disorder, while posting Instagram pictures proving she can fit in her 5 year old’s pajamas.  The only person Bethenny seems to take no issue with is Carole, and if you think about it, Carole is in many ways the most unlike Bethenny in the whole group.  Anyhow, food for thought.

 

6. I’m glad Ramona is dating and all over town. I don’t care who she sleeps with or if she’s out at bars every night because she’s a grown woman and it’s none of my business. Just like how it’s none of her business what Luann or Sonja are doing, and it’s the height of hypocrisy for her to have given Sonja as much shit for drinking and partying as she did all season.  Especially when we’ve been witness to 8 years of this behavior.

turtle time

 

7. I take no issue with Luann’s seemingly narcissistic behavior during her conversation with Jules at Dorinda’s house for a few reasons. The biggest reason is that Jules doesn’t care. And if she’s cool with it, why is Right Couch getting upset?  Luann apologized off camera (where it counts) and they’ve spoken about it since.  The other reason is that when that happened, Luann had just been hit by a mack truck in the form of a slut-shaming Bethenny and of course she was distracted and unable to put aside her own shit to comfort Jules.  I think a lot of us would have done the same. I know Right Couch wasn’t pleased with her answer, but Luann acknowledged her bad behavior while sticking up for herself and I’m fine with it.

 

8. I’ve said all season that I am no Lu-natic. I am not now, nor have I ever been a fan of the countess. I have been pushed into her corner by Bethenny’s antics this season, but other than that, I have no real horse in this race. Which is to say that I think Luann trying to turn things around on Bethenny and say that she’s a hypocrite for dating a married man is a dumb argument.  As we all know, married people can and do date and sleep with other people while they are splitting up from their spouse.  And some married people sleep with people outside of their marriage when they aren’t in the process of getting a divorce.  But in that case, it’s the responsibility of the married person to respect the sanctity of their marriage and not the responsibility of the third party.  This is a dumb argument.  On top of which, I’m not buying Luann’s story that the guy from Turks & Caico’s cried on her shoulder all night because she seemed to have no idea he was married until Kristen told her the next day.  You guys?  I hate them all.

 

9. Bethenny doubling down on the slut shaming is a bummer, but not surprising. I appreciate Andy asking her, “how is this not slut shaming”, because…um…hello. And I’m not buying that “I don’t know the exact definition of slut shaming” excuse from Bethenny.  I think the definition is pretty obvious.  You are shaming someone for acting “slutty”, right?  So let’s go over this again…

The definition of a “slut” is a woman who has many casual sexual partners.  So by definition, Luann is a slut.  Just like by definition, Andy Cohen is a faggot (“a male homosexual”).  But by using these derogatory words in an attempt to wound and insult, we are saying that what a slut and a faggot are by definition is wrong or a bad thing.  This is simply not true.  A grown woman is allowed to have as much safe and consenting sex as she wants.  It should be applauded, not admonished.  Men have been fully enjoying their sexuality for all of time while the rest of us are finally managing to catch up.

 

10. I hate how Bethenny has acted towards Luann all season, but ultimately I think Luann can take it and she’s no angel. That said, I take great issue with how she treated Jules. I’m not looking forward to next week.  ED is a serious issue and the way Bethenny and Carole treated Jules all season was abhorrent.  I know this was supposed to be the greatest season ever (season 3 still holds that title in my mind), but I, for one, can’t wait for it to be over.

 

BONUS THOUGHT: Is it just me, or does Jules look better/healthier?  Her face seems fuller.  I hope I’m right.

jules face

10thoughts written by Liz

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