1. Let’s do this one in a slightly different format. I’m going to say what I thought about each of the main players. We will start with Sonja. With apologies to Cary from RHOD, I am going to have to replace my twitter name to #WeNeedMoreSonja. I think at this point in real time, Sonja and Bethenny are having a battle over Sonja’s proposed Tipsy Girl brand liquor so that’s why she isn’t around. Seriously though. We need more Sonja.

2. We need less Luann. I mean, I’ll take RealLuann anyday, but that hula-hooping show-putting-on Luann was garbage. She shouts at Carole “you can’t ignore me forever!” Then says, “I don’t have time for people like that,” when Carole brushes her off. Luann’s next move is to take the time to sit across from Carole and stare at her until Carole was forced into awkward and bizarre-land conversation where Luann does NOT want to discuss the past but wants Carole to be buddies again. What?

3. Moving right along to Carole: She has style. I love it (and Bethenny’s). I love that most women wear these fancy dresses on their talking heads and she looks amazing in her sweaters. That get-up she was wearing to walk Baby was magical. I also understand and respect her avoidance of Luann. Chick is pissed. I don’t think Carole realized at the time how mean/rude it was to Jules for her to leave the brunch – it was especially mean the way she did it. She literally ran out, snickering with her sidekick the entire time. I felt badly for Jules.

4. Speaking of Carole’s sidekick, Bethenny was a real peach this episode, eh? She has always talked like she had fuck you money, but her feelings were never behind it. She’d get upset (eventually) when others were mad at her or didn’t like her. Remember her crying on the boat in those sad pigtails on the Scary Island trip after that dumb, dumb, very not smart person insulted her? Well, now she’s still talking like she has fuck you money, but now she does so her feelings are caught up. She thinks she is above and better than everyone, so no one has the ability to hurt her feelings. It was weird watching her avoid confrontation at her own home with John. Since when does she do that? I will give her props for finally screaming at John that they would be fine for Dorinda’s sake, but those props quickly vanished by her behavior at that brunch. She bitched the entire way there, she insulted Jules’ eating habits 3 FEET AWAY from Jules, she only spoke to Carole, and she too ran out of the house giggling. It made me not want her to ever return, and it reminded me that she just does not give a damn about being mean to everyone because she is so rich. She thinks she’s better than everyone else and I don’t like watching that. At least pretend to give a damn about other people, Jesus.

5. Poor, poor Jules. That’s all I have to say about that.

6. Jules’ husband Michael is so nice. So what if his house is a money pit? It’s his freaking house. He wants it the way he wants it. What kind of guest behaves like that and just starts insulting everything? Michael was so gracious and shrugged off Bethenny’s rude behavior and even offered to give a tour. Bethenny repaid him by running out in the middle of said tour without a word.

7. John was pretty unlikable this episode, but I did feel sorry for him when he kept trying to apologize to Bethenny and she kept running away. In the battle of words, he has a water gun to Bethenny’s assult rife. He’s just no match for her. He also threw some shade towards his friends at the brunch because there was a bee in the house. He literally said it didn’t occur to him that he would need his epi pen. Um, I’m pretty sure if you’re that allergic to bees you should always have it with you. Did he plan on having a bubble around him when he walked from the house to the car?

8. I feel badly for Dorinda in this too. She likes John. Everyone else hates him. We get it, stop telling her you hate him. Bethenny tried to play it off like the only bad thing she said was that she wants Dorinda to stop defending him, but she talking heads about his drinking and partying in a derogatory fashion all the time. Homegirl doesn’t like him. And that’s ok; I wouldn’t like him either if he spoke to me the way he talked to her. But Dorinda gets it so stop beating up the poor, dead horse.

9. You guys have gotten to know Ramona over the past few years, right? She is all about women, and women power, and building up women, and is SOOO offended when women want to bring their husband places. This Ramona left the party early to go on a date and completely skipped Jules’ lunch. BOOOOO. (I would have done the same thing, but without the hypocritical past pretenses.)

10. The last character in this episode was poor Luann’s date. He looked like a poor man’s Aidan Shaw in his Dad jeans and his tucked-in, plaid lumberjack shirt. He looks nothing like something I would picture Luann dating. My heart breaks for him. I hope he and Michael get a spin-off where they just say nice things about people, sip lemonade, and build furniture.

10thoughts written by Kerry