1. In keeping with the ‘goodbye’ theme of this episode, let me just say I’m ready to say goodbye to this season. Snore.

2. The ladies go shopping, which reminds me of the old-school Wives. Remember when the entire show was about shopping and Bravo would flash the price tags of everything? I had to look up myself that the purse Erika bought cost around $5000 (Chanel doesn’t list prices on their website so I can’t be sure). She acted like she couldn’t get that purse in the States. I have no expensive bags (I am Eileen, remember?) so I really don’t know, but it seems like something she could easily get. Why, again, are they going to a mall when they’re on vacation?

3. After they do something they could have done in California, the ladies head to the Burj Khalifa. Other than an admittedly fake apology, I don’t know what happened here. I’m so scared of heights even watching it on television made me nauseous.

4. I’m pretty sure Mount Everest is the tallest point in the world. Sorry, Erika Jayne. L

5. We jump to Yolanda, Brandi, and Kim having lunch in the park. It looks so forced I can’t believe the editors kept the scene in without nudging each other and silently making fun of the fans. Yolanda brings a bunch of food I wouldn’t have eaten; Brandi manages to offend everyone by wearing an “It’s not fun to be sober” shirt when 50% of the people she’s meeting up with are legit, struggling, alcoholics; and Kim looks like she went to a stylist to fix her hair. I think maybe Kim thought she was going to do a talking head and forgot she was just having a picnic?

6. Let’s get to the yacht. The women manage to offend everyone working by cursing. Kyle is appropriately mortified; the other women practice consequence-based ethics. They don’t care who they make uncomfortable on the boat because they can’t get arrested for cursing in front of the lowly yacht help.

7. Kathryn makes a private call to her mother (on speakerphone). Didn’t I make the case that Katheryn was going to use her mother’s illness as leverage to gain relevance to stay on the show? This is another data point in my proof column. Rinna cries and it reads as weird rather than sweet.

8. It’s just occurred to me that this season is so f’ing boring because literally all of these women are actors or performers. This whole season reads as fake. I love Vanderpump because the people lay everything out there – good, bad, and ugly. This show is too hidden. I think Rinna realizes this and is trying to manufacture something interesting to talk about.

9. Rinna’s attempt to spice up the season is the main drama point for the last few episodes. She says LVP wanted to drag Kyle into the Munchausen thing; LVP says she wanted to make sure they stayed out of it. I don’t know who to believe and frankly, I don’t care. Why are all these conversations happening off camera?

10. Kyle wisely decides to stick with LVP. It doesn’t matter who was right; LVP is the Queen and you should always try to stay in her good graces.

10thoughts written by Kerry