Buckle up folks, it’s gonna be a long one.  MTV decided to air the last two episodes of the season on the same night so my workload has doubled.  And I just know they are going to save the juicy good bits (aka Farrah and Larry the producers fight) for the very end.

First things first- we head over to Tennessee to check in with Maci who is still overloaded with work and kids and t-shirt companies and not getting much help from Taylor; even on the t-shirt company that he is the sole owner of.  Owner or not, Maci has basically taken over the t-shirt company because Taylor is mostly useless.  They argue about the workload in front of Bentley, which bugs me.  It doesn’t take much to tell your kid to go play in their room.  Taylor says he feels like he bought a company and now people are looking at him like he’s an idiot.  I hope that this is just the way MTV is editing it, but have we seen Taylor do anything with the t-shirt line?

Farrah’s dad watches Sophia while Farrah and Simon go to dinner.  Simon says he is excited about Farrah moving to LA because he misses her when they aren’t together.  Simon is a liar, liar whose pants are ablaze with fire.  Farrah wants a bigger commitment from Simon before they live together.  Simon agrees.  Simon has his own money, right?  I’m confused because if this isn’t a gold digger thing, then I really don’t get it.

Gary still hasn’t told Amber if Leah can go to Florida (my money is still on a big fat no), and she and Matt have already finished their first house flip.  The place looks cute and will be listed for $69,900.  I live in the bay area, so prices like that make me cry.  Amber’s grandmother meets up with them for dinner and they all discuss the Florida trip.  Amber says that she hopes Gary says yes because she can’t imagine not seeing Leah on Christmas.  It doesn’t seem to occur to her that Gary probably feels the same way.    Not to mention, this is Gary’s other daughter Emily’s first Christmas so I’d guess it’s important to him to have the girls together.

Catelynn having a hard time getting out of bed and we see a shot of Tyler looking up “post-partum depression” on his phone.  Tyler and his mom go out to dinner and Tyler expresses his concern about Cate.  They are both pretty positive that Catelynn is suffering from depression.  Catelynn has been sleeping all day and Tyler is fed up and running out of sympathy.  It’s really hard to be with a depressed person all the time and it puts a lot of strain on a relationship.  I personally think it would be helpful for both Tyler and Catelynn to go to therapy together so that Tyler can learn some coping mechanisms and how he should act around Cate when he is frustrated.

Back in Chattanooga, we meet up with Ryan’s dad Larry, aka my favorite person on this show, who is washing out his truck bed.  Larry asks if Ryan and Maci are communicating better, Ryan confirms that they are, and Larry comments that they typically get along better when Ryan is single.  Ryan says he isn’t interested in anybody and Larry asks where the hell Ryan goes at 11pm every night if it isn’t to be with some girl?  Ryan says that he just “rides around”.

Later that night, producer Jaala asks Ryan why he lied to his dad because apparently, Ryan wants to move to Nashville to be closer to Shelby, his ex who I guess he is seeing again? Ryan didn’t want to tell his parents because it isn’t set yet and he knows they will worry about Bentley which is totally reasonable.  To the best of my knowledge, Bentley doesn’t spend time with Ryan unless it’s at Ryan’s parent’s house so if Ryan moves to Nashville, when will he see Bentley?  I’m not sure I can see Maci being comfortable with sending Bentley off to be with just Ryan even if Nashville is only about 2 hours away from Chattenooga.

farrah and simon lunch with michael

 

Before Simon leaves TX, Michael asks to spend time with him (well, them- but we all know Michael has a weird man crush on Simon).  Farrah is leasing her house in a couple of weeks so the timeline for the move has sped up.  Michael says that he is sad about them moving and Farrah couldn’t seem to care less about Michael’s feelings- but that’s because Farrah doesn’t care about anyone’s feelings.  Farrah says that she and Simon are dating-ish but that she needs a ring from him.  In fact, Farrah says that tomorrow they are going to go look at rings.  You know, how you do with people you’re only dating-ish.

Jesus.  Can you imagine a lifetime with Farrah?  What. A. Horror show.

Amber asks Kristina over text if she knows if Leah is going to be able to come to Florida.  Kristina doesn’t respond and Matt calls Gary and Kristina “cowards”.  Has Amber spoken to Gary about this in person yet?  Because it seems like she is only communicating with him via text.  You know, like a coward.  Matt makes a good point in that Gary is really in no position to judge them on things like addiction and impulse control since he is “just shy of 600lbs”.  Leah is genetically predisposed to obesity and if Gary isn’t demonstrating healthy eating habits around her, she could be in a world of trouble later on.  We also learn that Gary and Kristina are now married.  Apparently, Gary’s lawyer wanted him to show “stability”, so he went out and got married- no engagement or real wedding.  That Kristina is one lucky lady.

cate depressed

Catelynn says that she wants to be able to tell Tyler how down she’s been feeling but she doesn’t know how.  I’m really surprised that with all these two have gone through, that their communication skills are this poor.  Kiki, Cate and Ty’s producer (and godmother of their 2nd child) finally asks her what’s going on.  Catelynn says that any number of things could be going on but that she needs to go to therapy.  Kiki offers her support and I really like how the show has incorporated the producers and film crew.  They really are a major part of the cast’s lives and I like that we see that now.

We join Farrah and Simon at the jewelers where they are shopping for diamond rings.  Farrah is shocked that the $17k ring that she likes is “so cheap” because she is used to looking at rings that are $60k or above.  Farrah asks to look at the most expensive ring in the store.  She’s disappointed that it’s only $32,000.  I hate Farrah so much.

Over at Maci’s, I am reminded of why I love the south.  Bentley talks back to Maci at the dinner table and she puts him in his place and sends him upstairs to think about what he’s done.  Over at Farrah’s house, if Sophia had done the same thing, Farrah would have laughed it off, or flipped out at Debra or Michael if they tried to correct Soph.  And that is why Bentley is going to be a decent, well-adjusted kid and Sophia is going to be even more a nightmare than she already is.  Taylor also gets scolded for giggling with Bentley, but he apologizes.

Over at Gary and Kristina’s, their producer congratulates them on their recent wedding, which was at a court house with just the two of them, their daughter Emily, and a judge.  Gary admits on camera that this marriage looks good for a judge and again I say, that Kristina is a lucky gal.  Gary proposed on a Saturday and they got married the following Monday.  Gary wore a baseball cap.  Also- before the producer comes over, we hear a quick snippet of a conversation where Gary tells Kristina that Leah asked him about going to Florida and he is inclined to say no because it’s Christmas, which is no surprise.

catelynn in therapy

Catelynn is meeting with her therapist and says that she really wants to get out of “this funk”.  I don’t like how Cate’s storyline is handling depression.  Catelynn says that she doesn’t know if what she is feeling is post-partum or just her “regular mental illness”.    She also keeps talking in the past tense, like when she asks the therapist, “do you think I WAS struggling with post-partum?” (I added the emphasis).  I just don’t hear anyone talking about what Catelynn can do to help herself now when she is feeling anxious or depressed.

Maci works on computer

Maci feels bad about snapping at Bentley, but I think she handled it just fine.  She says that Taylor has been helping out more which is good.  Maci has a travel-sized cornhole game and I am green with envy.  Maci cracks the whip and tells Taylor that he needs to enter in the inventory numbers for the t-shirts because she already organized everything.  I agree with Maci that her name should be added to the company or she should be given some equity considering all of the work that she is putting in.

Simon is leaving Austin and Farrah is baby talking in the car on the way to the airport and its annoying as fuck.  Sophia yells at Simon and tells him that he needs to marry her mom and give her a baby sister or brother.  Farrah keeps doing this thing where she reaches over and pinches Simon’s cheeks and I swear to god if we someday hear that Simon has been arrested for murder, I will not be surprised.

Gary has finally responded to Amber’s text messages, but hasn’t given her a final answer regarding Florida yet.  We see Gary and Kristina talking it over and I am blown away by the maturity and understanding Gary displays.  He decides that it will be good for Leah to go, and that saying yes to this request opens up a door of better communication and understanding between Amber and him.  Kristina encourages this decision and she seems like a really nice girl.  I hope someday Gary lets her do a real wedding, assuming she wants that sort of thing.  Both Amber and Matt are pleasantly surprised by this result and are looking forward to their trip.

ty worried

Tyler asks Catelynn how her appointment went and Cate says that the therapist thinks she “had” post-partum.  Tyler, thankfully, keeps talking in the present tense, because this is an on-going problem, not something they’ve already worked through.  Catelynn keeps panicking that she is going to be going through this “forever” and that’s really what needs to be addressed.  The truth is, depression is more often chemical problem than a circumstantial issue.  Catelynn may have to deal with this on and off for the rest of her life and someone needs to say to her that that’s okay and that depression can be managed with therapy and medication.  She’s scared of this very real possibility and everyone keeps brushing it under a rug and it’s really bugging me.

WOOHOO!  We made it through hour 1!  Aaaaaand we dive back in basically right where we left off.

Catelynn is “still working on” her depression but she says that Tyler has been much more supportive since they talked.  They meet up for lunch at what looks like a Denny’s and they split a bottle of champagne.  Tyler is happy that they are getting some time to themselves since all they ever talk about is Nova.  Speaking of Nova, her first birthday is coming up and Butch is upset because he might not be able to attend if April (Cate’s mom) comes because there is a still a “no contact” order in place that says he can’t be around her while he is on probation.  Didn’t they both attend the wedding?  Did they get an exception for that?   Butch says that he will do whatever he has to do to not go back to jail.

maci and taylor

Maci is swamped with the t-shirt company so she asks Ryan to help out more with pick-ups and drop-offs to Bentley’s recreational activities.  Ryan is agreeable and I like it when these two have good interactions.  Maci and Taylor go out to dinner and Taylor says he is enjoying their awkward dinner in a quiet room with eight people staring at them (the camera pans out to show the crew behind Maci).  Taylor gives Maci props for parenting at age 16 because he can’t imagine doing that himself.  I like it when Taylor and Maci look like they are operating as a team.

Farrah is looking for a new house in LA with her mom and Sophia.  Farrah is wearing “shorts” that leave nothing to the imagination and have half her ass cheeks hanging out.  After Farrah refuses to get out of the car because she has no interest in one of the houses, Debra snots to the real estate agent that Farrah doesn’t want an “old house”.  Sophia yells at Debra for hurting the real estate agents feelings, which is fair, but then Sophia slaps Debra.  This is not the first time that we’ve watched Sophia hit her grandmother and of course, no one corrects this behavior or reprimands Sophia at all.  Can you imagine if Bentley hit his grandmother in front of Maci?  The phrase “tan your hide” comes to mind…

Amber and Matt are back from Florida and even though Gary let Leah go on the trip, Amber is pissed that Gary told her that he only did that so that Leah doesn’t resent him for keeping her from Amber.  Amber wants to get more custody of Leah but she wants to try to settle things out of court.  We get a return of Krystal the Kousin because Amber doesn’t have any other friends to talk to.  Amber wants 50/50 custody and right now she is getting the state minimum which is once a week and every other weekend.  I’m not sure I agree with 50/50 if that means that Leah is at a different house every other week.  Kids need stability, especially when it comes to school.  I get that Amber wants more time with Leah, but the agreement that they have now is pretty standard.  I saw my dad every other weekend and every Wednesday.

At Maci’s, her dog pees on the floor and Taylor has to clean it up because Maci isn’t cleaning up piss for a month.  I don’t really understand how you could live with a dog that isn’t housebroken.  I would lose my mind.  Toby the wonder dog has had 2 accidents in the 7 years I’ve had him and both times were because he was really sick.

Ryan and his graying hair meet up with his friend Hamilton (very awesome and topical name) in Ryan’s parent’s garage.  Ryan says that Maci has been communicating with him more and he appreciates that.  I guess the whole Shelby secret from the first hour is over with because Ryan tells Hamilton that they (Shelby and Ryan) are pretty much done and that while he was considering moving to Nashville, he doesn’t think that Bentley needs to deal with that much change just yet.  I love not-selfish Ryan.

Kiki the producer asks Tyler and Catelynn what the deal is with the party and the no contact order.  Butch says that he is not allowed to be in the same room as April, so he will have to miss the first part of it.  This will be Butch’s first time at a grandkid’s birthday because he has always been in jail.  He was also never at one of Tyler’s birthday parties and that makes me sad.  Butch says he will be fine if he can just see Nova try to blow out candles; even if it’s on a second cake.

Farrah wasn’t able to find a house that she liked in LA, but Simon is back in Austin to visit and he apparently found a place that is up to Farrah’s “not old” standards.  It’s a 2 million dollar home which doesn’t actually mean a whole heck of a lot depending on where she is trying to be in LA.  Farrah’s real estate agent in Austin found someone to lease her current home, so that’s all squared away and the big move is in two weeks.

Amber has 6 dogs and 2 cats.  Her house must reek.  Amber has decided to offer child support in the hopes that Gary will give her more time.  Baby Emily looks just like Gary.  Poor baby Emily.  Producer Heather tries to get Amber to talk about the texts with Gary and Amber wigs out and says that she doesn’t want to talk about it every day on camera.  Heather looks shocked and confused by this behavior, but I know for a fact that Heather also works with Farrah regularly so I refuse to believe that she is shocked by this kind of behavior from “the talent”.

Nova’s birthday party is happening at Catelynn’s dad’s house.  Cate’s dad is a nonentity on this show, so that’s a little weird.  Catelynn’s sister who we have never seen before or heard from is also there.  I’m intrigued and want to know more.  Where was Cate’s dad when everything was going to hell for her in high school?  Is the sister a full sister or a half-sister? So many questions and it’s the end of the season.  Anyhow, April says she isn’t leaving the party early for Butch because it’s his fault that there’s a no-contact order in place and she shouldn’t be punished for it and asked to leave.  I get that, but I feel bad for Butch.  Butch is bummed that he is at April’s mercy and can’t come over until she decides to leave but he understands that it was his decisions and actions that led to this.

ryan

Ryan keeps his word and picks up Bentley from basketball and drops him off at Maci’s.  He sees Maci’s house for the first time and gets to see Bentley’s cool blue room.  Ryan and Maci have a sit down where Ryan owns up to the fact that he has really let his parents be in charge of Bentley when he should have been the one stepping up.  Ryan tells Maci that he appreciates her communicating with him and making things easy.  Maci tells Ryan that she’s proud of him and Ryan looks down when she says this, but he also cracks a smile.  I actually got a little choked up during this scene.  Maci’s story doesn’t always make for compelling reality TV but I appreciate on a human level how much she has grown and how she handles herself and her family.

Gary apparently agreed to Amber’s proposal of more time with Amber paying child support, but when he sent the “new” contract to Amber’s lawyer, it was the same minimum state required custody.  I’m not really sure I understand what Amber wanted the contract to say differently because she agrees that Leah should be with Gary on school nights.  Gary seems to want to try to work things out and agrees to reword the parenting contract to allow for a more flexible schedule.  Regardless, Amber SHOULD be paying child support.  Gary’s home is Leah’s primary residence and he has taken care of her non-stop since day one.  Child support shouldn’t be used as a bargaining chip or something that you pay in order to get something for yourself.  It’s something you pay to ensure that your child has everything he or she needs and as a parent, it’s your responsibility to do it.

OH HERE WE GO!  Simon is back in LA and Farrah has locked herself in her house because she is PISSED that MTV won’t let her be a part of another reality show due to her contractual obligations with them.  Heather (the producer I mentioned before) is trying to get her to come out and speak with Larry who is sort of like the big boss of producers.   Larry says that MTV rejected Farrah’s request because the other show is about therapy with her mom and would be covering the same storylines as Teen Mom OG at the same time and not to mention- it’s on a completely different network.  Yup.  Seems like a cut and dry contractual conflict to me.  Not that Farrah and Debra don’t DESPERATELY need therapy.

farrah larry

Farrah finally comes out of her house and strolls up to Larry all fake friendly asking why the crew is even there since there is a “void in [their] agreement” since they won’t let her do the other show.  Farrah says that Larry needs to talk to her lawyer.  Larry says that by Farrah refusing to let them film, she is in breach of contract.  Farrah plasters a big fake smile on her face and heartily disagrees.  And then she calls Larry “sweetheart” and tells him to get on his ass and make a phone call to her lawyer and to do his job.  Larry says that he has done his job.  Oh my god you guys it just gets so good.  Farrah bitches that the two shows are totally different and Larry disagrees.  Then, THEN!  Farrah asks Larry why he is such white trash that he feels the need to keep arguing with her. Let’s all take a minute and let that sink in.  Farrah Abraham, who got her start on a show called 16 & Pregnant and who is also the star of the “Backdoor Teen Mom” sex tape where in one scene, she ass fucks a glass dildo in the back of a town car, tells Larry the television producer that HE is the one who is white trash.  Farrah storms off back inside her house and we go to a commercial.

Ryan tells his parents, Jen and Larry, that Maci told him she is proud of him and it warms my heart that that did actually mean something to him.  Jen reminds Ryan that Maci has never once kept Bentley from him and that all Maci’s ever wanted was for Ryan to be involved in Bentley’s life.  Ryan says that he knows that and he sees now how he has to be for things to work.  He goes so far as to admit that it’s been his fault when things have gotten messed up.  Both Jen and I start crying.  I’m not one to give awards out to people who finally step up and handle the responsibilities that they’ve neglected for so long, mostly because I don’t think you should get a present for finally doing the right thing, but like Maci I am really proud of Ryan.  On the other hand, Maci is scared that if Ryan gets a girlfriend all of this progress will go away, but I hope that doesn’t happen.

nova cake

At Nova’s birthday, April finally heads out at 4:30 so that Butch can come over.  They all do 2nd cake together and I can’t help but think that that is a LOT of sugar for a baby to consume.  Butch is bummed that it took so long but he is happy that he was able to be a part of it at all since he has never gotten to go to a birthday celebration for a grandkid before.

Over at Amber’s house, her dogs are also not housebroken.  What the hell, people.  I know it takes work, but train your damn dogs to go to the bathroom outside.  Amber says that Gary has agreed to change the custody agreement but she thinks he is only doing it because she’s going to be paying him.  Yeah.  I wouldn’t change it without child support either.  Matt says that co-parenting is hard no matter what the situation is.  I’m not sure I agree with that since Matt’s situation looks pretty easy in that he is doing zero parenting to any of his 2-7 children.

But really, these last few scenes were just time killers until we get back to Farrah and Larry.

farrah yells at larry

Farrah has still locked the crew out of her house and producer Heather calls Michael to give him a heads up on what’s going on.  Michael shows up and tries to calm Farrah down.  I know this is going to come as a shock to everyone, but Farrah does not calm down.  She storms out of the house, calls Larry a “dip shit” and says that he doesn’t understand what the other show was going to be about.  Larry argues that he DOES understand, and that what would be discussed on that show is the same as what is discussed on Teem Mom.  And that’s when Farrah decides to call him a “dumb, twisted, mother fucker”.  They both scream over each other and it’s hard to make out exactly what is said, but Larry (correctly) reminds Farrah that she got her start from this show (well, 16 & Pregnant, but that’s just splitting hairs).  Farrah screams that Daddy Derek dying is what made the show get picked up which makes no sense.  And then she bursts into tears and pushes Larry.  Hmm… I wonder why Sophia thinks it’s okay to hit people.  Larry says that they have always been supportive of Farrah.  Farrah does not agree and keeps telling Larry to go fuck himself and that she will never work with them (MTV in general) again.

And that’s a wrap!  This was a good season all-in-all.  I loved the progress that was made by Ryan. Maci continues to be the most put together of the Teen Moms.  Amber seems to be doing great and I may live to regret this statement but I still think Matt is more of a positive figure in her life than a negative one.  I’m glad Tyler and Catelynn finally got married and that Butch is out of jail but I think her depression storyline could have been handled better.  And lastly, I’m willing to bet that Farrah will most likely be back next season.  Mostly because you can only make so many molds of your anatomy to be sold as sex toys before you need to find a more stable gig.

Recap written by Liz 

10thoughtsblog@gmail.com

@10thoughtsblog

 

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